Last semester, I cruised by asynchronous learning, watching recorded lectures at 2x speed without a care in the world. But after one riveting opinion piece by the DP, I too decided to “sabotage my sleep schedule in order to take synchronous classes.” 

And boy, is it going great! I feel just like a real student!

Here’s how my schedule looks: I wake up at 7am to attend a club meeting because on top of all my classes, I’m expected to have a healthy distribution of extracurriculars as well. Then, I stay up for the next 15 hours doing work because I don’t have a healthy work life balance. Then, I have back to back classes till 4am. Then, I practise self care by getting a REM sanctioned sleep cycle in. This may sound grim now, but once daylight savings hits I’ll get to sleep at 3am! Of course, then my clubs will meet at 6am, but I don’t want to think about that. 

Asynchronous classes were a passive style of learning that did not encourage memory retention. By contrast, my brain retains all of the class lectures from 3am. I learned that fact from my Psych lecture! (Which was entirely asynchronous, but I took it at 4am for the verisimilitude) I mean, I’m still mic off, camera off, because my family’s sleeping and I look terrible in this 2am light, but closing your eyes in exhaustion during class helps you hear the lecture better, right? 

One really important thing about synchronous learning is the opportunity for discussions with my classmates. And boy, was this worth staying up for! I’d never considered that maybe “paying taxes alienates the rich from society” but I’m sure glad that Peter Bartholomew opened my eyes to this radical perspective. 

I’ve also gotten closer to my professors this semester, which as an aging Sophomore, is critical for my academic journey. Just last week, I unmuted myself to the professor to tell him that his screenshare was off! He said thanks, and I’m pretty sure he now remembers me in this hundred-person class. 

Are asynchronous classes x when the derivative is equal to 0? Because they’re maximized! [[This is a very funny joke because that point can also be minimized God why am I so funny at 12:50am right before my next class starts]]