The Global Financial Crisis

Moderator: Welcome to day 4 of the University of Pennsylvania forum on the global economic crisis. For those of you just joining us, I will reintroduce the members of the panel:
-To my left is Dr. Steven Harm, professor of economics at Georgetown University.
-Next to him is Dr. Cassandra Bullock, professor of political science here at Penn.
-On Dr. Bullock’s left is Dr. Andre Corner, a professor of anthropology at the University of Delaware. I’m not sure why he’s here.
-To my right is my cousin Rick, his wife Ida, and their two kids Jeff and Miranda. They were on their way to New York when their car broke down so they’re currently staying in my basement.
-And finally, I am Pamela Drabeson, the moderator of the forum. I will now ask Ms. Johnson, the notetaker, to recap yesterday’s session. Ms. Johnson?

Ms. Johnson:
Thank you. Yesterday’s session ended 9 hours early after a bird flew in through the window and freaked everybody out.

Moderator: Ah yes, I think we all remember the bird. With the formalities out of the way, let’s begin day 4 of the forum. Dr. Bullock, you asked to begin?

Dr. Bullock: Yes, thank you. I was hoping to begin today’s session by talking about the diversity of market structures that contributed to the economic collapse of-

Rick: -Excuse me Dr. Bullock I hate to interrupt but I have a question for the moderator.

Moderator: Rick, please ask your question then Dr. Bullock will continue.

Rick: I just got off the phone with the mechanic and he said it might take another day to fix the car.

Moderator: What a shame! Well you’re welcome to keep sleeping at our place.

Rick: Cool, thanks Pam.

Dr. Corner: Is it my turn yet?

Moderator: Dr. Bullock you may continue now.

Dr. Bullock: To be honest I completely forget what I was talking about.

Dr. Harm: I wasn’t paying attention in the first place.

Dr. Bullock: Oh, I remember!

Moderator: Please continue.

Dr. Bullock: -2008.

Moderator: Thank you. An insightful comment to begin today’s session. Dr. Harm, would you like to respond?

Dr. Harm: No.

Rick: Excuse me, madame speaker, I hate to interrupt again, but may I ask another question?

You don’t have to call me ‘madame speaker.’ But please, go ahead.

Rick: What are your plans for dinner tonight?

Moderator: …I’m not sure yet. You don’t have to wait for me, why don’t you guys grab dinner in the city?

Rick: Oh, well, we’re a little low on cash, you know we only brought so much for the trip…

Moderator: Alright you can have whatever you’d like at our place. Make yourself at home.

You’re the best Pam.

Dr. Corner: It must be my turn now, right?

Please control yourself Dr. Corner. Dr. Harm, is there anything you’d like to add?

Dr. Harm:

Dr. Bullock: I’d like to chime in if you wouldn’t mind.

Moderator: Go right ahead Dr. Bullock.

Dr. Bullock: I just want to reiterate a point I was making earlier. The diversity of market struc-

Dr. Harm: -tures yes we all remember.

Dr. Bullock: Well, just in case anyone didn’t hear it…

Dr. Harm: We all heard it.

Miranda: Pam do you have any hot dogs at your place?

Rick: Miranda! Don’t interrupt the panel! Actually…Pam, do you have any hot dogs?

Dr. Corner: Please, if I could just have a minute….

Ida: This is the worst panel I’ve ever been to!

Dr. Bullock: Screw you Ida. We’re doing the best we can.

Moderator: Can we please get back on track?

Ms. Johnson: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Dr. Harm: Jesus Christ!!

Dr. Corner: It’s gonna kill us!

Rick: Everybody run!

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