A platypus once stole a roast beef sandwich from my lunchbox
A platypus taught Fred Durst how to rap
Seriously, I really wanted that roast beef sandwich
A platypus slept with my prom date
Platypuses look really, really weird
The plural of “platypus” is not “platypi”
A platypus invented roaming charges
A platypus broke the curve on my Econ final freshman year
Platypuses are the reason they never show Hey Arnold on Nickelodeon anymore
A platypus co-wrote “Who Let the Dogs Out”
Mao Zedong was really a platypus in an elaborate costume
A platypus will turn you to stone if you stare directly into its eyes
Platypuses are conniving, money-grubbing, power-hungry schemers
The platypus is the cause of every major wart in history
Mount Everest is just Nepal’s attempt to get as far away as possible from the world’s platypuses
John Wilkes Booth was raised by a family of platypuses
JFK was assassinated by Lee Harvey Oswald, but Lee Harvey Oswald’s best friend was a platypus
The platypus is a blight upon modern society, poisoning our minds, kidnapping our children, and having violent congress with our women.
The platypus is a crime against nature. It is a venomous, egg-laying, duck-billed, beaver-tailed, otter-footed demon, bent upon sowing discord and disrupting Man’s most perfect quietude.
“Platypus” starts to sound weird if you type it enough times
