Hey kids! Are you tired of eating dry, tasteless, vegetarian cereal for breakfast every day? Tired of wishing there was something in your breakfast to add that extra kick, but still has that sweet, all natural taste you love? Then Honey Bunches of Goats is the cereal for you!
It’s time to pry the hands of the vegetarians from around Uncle Sam’s neck and end their oppressive dictatorship over breakfast cereals nationwide. Finally, non-vegetarians across the country can enjoy cereal without feeling emasculated. From the makers of Shredded Meat and Lice Krispies comes this all-new cereal that you won’t be able to get enough of! Just imagine coming down for breakfast and seeing that familiar boring ol’ cereal box sitting on the table. Aw Mom, not again!, you wail. Your day’s already gotten off to a bad start, until you get to the table that is. You trudge over to your seat, wondering what you did in your six short years of life to deserve this kind of treatment. Your tears of self-loathing turn into tears of joy after you take a bite and realize the one thing that’s been missing in your cereal this whole time has finally turned up: chunky, succulent cubes of organic grass-fed heterosexual hormone-free all-American goat*. Yes sir these goats have been hand fed good old-fashioned Midwestern pasture their entire lives. Don’t go a day without it. Never in your wildest dreams have you imagined a cereal that tastes this good!
Tired of your kids not getting enough red meat in their breakfast? This kid-tested**, mom approved breakfast extravaganza contains three FULL servings of goat in every bowl—a mother’s dream! It’s the Other Red Meat you can’t afford NOT to eat! How does the meat stay fresh, you ask? Each piece of goat in Honey Bunches of Goats is coated with a special formulation designed to seal flavor in and keep maggots out! That fresh goat taste will last for weeks!!
Part of a balanced breakfast. Now have Honey Bunches of Goats for lunch! Goes great with a hot cup of Lamb Chowder or a bowl of Frosted Snakes. Find us in the breakfast aisle of your grocery store next to Polar Bear Naked Granola.
Try Honey Bunches of Goats today!
*Warning: product may contain nuts.
** 4/5 baby goats recommend this cereal.