Penn English Majors are the Specific Type of Girl who Would F@$%! Mr. Tumnus

James McAvoy hosted the most recent episode of Saturday Night Live which featured a sketch about his character in the Chronicles of Narnia Mr. Tumnus becoming an unlikely sex icon for a very “specific” type of girl. There have been rumors on campus that this specific girl may in fact be a reference to every English major at the University of Pennsylvania.

This was confirmed through an extensive investigation and interview process in which every female student at the university majoring or minoring  in English was shown a picture of McAvoy as Mr. Tumnus and asked if they would or had previously imagined having sexual or romantic relations with him.

Heyleigh Williams, a senior with a concentration in erotic poetry, responded, “Of course. I was a bit of a bookish youth. A bit odd. Never quite fit in with the other girls if you know what I mean. Perhaps it was my own quirks that endeared me to the character. He made me feel seen.”

Her friend Josalin Rembrant, a junior double majoring in Gender, Sexuality, and Women Studies, added, “My brothers actually used to tease me about a poster of him I had on my wall. They would point out that he wasn’t even a man, but I think that’s what drew me to him. Comforted by his unique identity, I was able to explore my own sexual desires through that poster without the oppression of a fully male gaze.”

Sophomore Amy Smith responded, “Is that James McAvoy? I mean for sure I’d f*** James McAvoy. Who wouldn’t?”

However, Smith’s reaction was an anomaly as nearly every other girl interviewed immediately recognized the character and made clear that they actually preferred him in the books which they liked more than the movies. Ultimately, every single English student interviewed affirmed that they were in fact the specific type of girl who would be attracted to Mr. Tumnus.

Besides Smith, the only other student interviewed who did not recognize the character refused to give her name. Upon examining the photograph of McAvoy in costume, she answered, “Only the bottom half.” We did not press for further details.

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