Everyone already knows the basics about New College House West, like how it has a boring-ass coffee bar and a “restaurant-style” “Quaker” “Kitchen.” But there’s a lot more than meets the eye to this Elon-Musk’s-Vacation-Home-style dorm. Our staff has complied the top 18 facts you might not know about NCHW:

1. The residents call themselves Westies.
2. Even the roaches are new!
3. The West in NCHW is named for Kanye West.
4. There’s a swimming pool on the roof. We’ve totally seen it. We swear.
5. Amy G is counting down the days until Penn changes the name to “Gutmann College House.”
6. T-Pain lives there (without the T-).
7. In line with the Quakers’ pacifist philosophy, Quaker Kitchen has no knives.
8. The third floor has a secret shrine to #GirlbossGutmann next to the elevator, where students bring little trinkets and sacrifices. Legend says an offering of three pantsuits will summon a hologram of the goddess herself.
9. The dorm name “Newer College House” was ultimately rejected after rounds of deliberation.
10. NCHW and Lauder College House are actually the same building…it just teleports back and forth faster than people can blink. 
11. Campus hotspot West and Down is short for New College House West and Down.
12. Rumor has it that NCHW is the filming location for season 4 of Netflix’s You.
13. No one can hear when you go to the NCHW basement to scream out all of your pent-up anger. Or no, wait–that’s actually the Gregory College House basement.
14. Forget studying abroad, because NCHW is where you can actually find yourself. Did you know that real Westies pronounce Quaker Kitchen Quacké Cuichon?
15. New College House East was killed when Dorothy’s house landed on top of it. NCHW has been plotting revenge ever since.
16. The Quaker Kitchen chef is really just Ben Franklin’s ghost.
17. Visiting NCHW is a far enough walk for Penn students to call it, “exploring West Philadelphia.”
18. There’s a sex dungeon?? Maybe?? Nah…forget we said anything.