Everyone already knows the basics about New College House West, like how it has a boring-ass coffee bar and a “restaurant-style” “Quaker” “Kitchen.” But there’s a lot more than meets the eye to this Elon-Musk’s-Vacation-Home-style dorm. Our staff has complied the top 18 facts you might not know about NCHW:
- The residents call themselves Westies.
- Even the roaches are new!
- The West in NCHW is named for Kanye West.
- There’s a swimming pool on the roof. We’ve totally seen it. We swear.
- Amy G is counting down the days until Penn changes the name to “Gutmann College House.”
- T-Pain lives there (without the T-).
- In line with the Quakers’ pacifist philosophy, Quaker Kitchen has no knives.
- The third floor has a secret shrine to #GirlbossGutmann next to the elevator, where students bring little trinkets and sacrifices. Legend says an offering of three pantsuits will summon a hologram of the goddess herself.
- The dorm name “Newer College House” was ultimately rejected after rounds of deliberation.
- NCHW and Lauder College House are actually the same building…it just teleports back and forth faster than people can blink.
- Campus hotspot West and Down is short for New College House West and Down.
- Rumor has it that NCHW is the filming location for season 4 of Netflix’s You.
- No one can hear when you go to the NCHW basement to scream out all of your pent-up anger. Or no, wait–that’s actually the Gregory College House basement.
- Forget studying abroad, because NCHW is where you can actually find yourself. Did you know that real Westies pronounce Quaker Kitchen Quacké Cuichon?
- New College House East was killed when Dorothy’s house landed on top of it. NCHW has been plotting revenge ever since.
- The Quaker Kitchen chef is really just Ben Franklin’s ghost.
- Visiting NCHW is a far enough walk for Penn students to call it, “exploring West Philadelphia.”
- There’s a sex dungeon?? Maybe?? Nah…forget we said anything.