Is this still the 21st century? Is Obama still president? Ares bees still the most effective pollen collectors from Phylum Arthropoda? What happened? Bees used be all the rage, but now it seems like they’ve simply been forgotten by everyone besides myself and my fellow apiarists.

The bee (or Clade Anthophila for the egocentric ignoramuses of the animal kingdom) is a member of the top 10 most important organisms on this planet… and you don’t even care. Honey bees, bumble bees, stinging bees, non-stinging bees – and could you even tell the difference? No. But I can. In fact, I can distinguish between 12,496 of the 20,000 known species of bee, and by the end of this year I intend on making that figure 13,183.

I remember the golden days. The days in which you would hear “Wow! Look at that magnificent Apinai Bombus transitioning from its larval stage to its pupal stage!” as you walked down the street. But now, now all I hear is kids talking about their rap music and which prosthetic limb is best. I even see children running away from bees! Why would you do such a thing? If a bee stings you, so what! You’ll be ok, you big baby. Think about the bees for once, and maybe you will think twice before running away and waving your arms around like a stupid grasshopper.