When we found out about the tunnels that run beneath the Quad, we decided to investigate. Here’s a list of what we found:


  • A squirrel the size of a large cat
  • Donald Trump’s final exams
  • A halal truck (still $6)
  • A fully-staffed spa
  • An animatronic Ben Franklin robot which repeats lesser-known quotes (e.g. “Knowledge without education is worth about $300 thousand”)
  • Offshoots connected to College Hall, Hill, and Amy Gutmann’s house in New York
  • List of students who will be accepted into Classes of 2024-31
  • The Chamber of Secrets (only accessible to Wharton students)
  • 30 years of Commons leftovers
  • The Spelunking Club HQ
  • Missing bricks from Locust Walk
  • The room where the RAs throw down

Hopes and dreams of college freshmen

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