For Chloe Doray, a freshman from suburban Milwaukee, the best part of her Penn experience so far has been her frequent appointments with Dr. Wendy Patel at Women’s Health.

“Going to Women’s Health is the best, even without a legit reason for visiting. None of my NSO friends ever invite me to sceney events or seem to want to dish about sexy gossip with me…  But whenever I see Dr. Wendy, that’s like literally the first thing she wants to talk about! OMG, she is SUCH a Samantha! Like, she’ll actually ask me about my sex life or if I do drugs–ha! I mean… I never have anything to report about those, but she asks me legit every time I see her. She must think I’m like the baddest ‘beep’ out there!”

(Ed. note: Chloe said “beep” in the interview. This is not a redaction. She chose to say “beep”.)

“Dr. Wendy is SO totally funny. Whenever I visit her, it’s like we’re basically having brunch on Sex and the City, which is my favorite show everrrr.”

(Ed. note: Chloe paused the interview to show off her Mr. Big Tumblr fanpage.)

“Oh! And she even offers me condoms when I visit… like, woah there, Dr. Wendy, I’m not some sort of sex maniac! Lol, I still have that one condom they gave us in 8th grade Sex Ed after that abstinence talk, #aspirational. Speaking of which, Dr. Wendy, do condoms expire? But I guess owning a condom does make me a bad ‘beep’ after all…”

(Ed. note: Chloe pulled out her phone and added “do condoms expire?” to her ‘Fun things to joke around about with Dr. Wendy’ note)

Chloe has been utilizing Student Health’s appointment scheduling resources. “It feels like my social calendar is just filling up now that Dr. Wendy and I are hanging so much!”

She has seven more appointments with Dr. Wendy Patel scheduled before winter break. 

But she was quick to add, “it’s only because you can’t schedule for next semester yet!”