Worldwide Outbreak of “Shitty Week”

SHOCKING! New studies are flooding in to report that your shitty week was not yours alone.

So stop what you’re doing, whether it’s listening to your fav self-pity playlist or stress eating a jar of Nutella. 

According to a recent study, the week of October 14th, 2019 was a shitty week for absolutely EverYOnE on Earth. There were wide-spread accounts from people worldwide claiming they were “just kinda stressed this week, I don’t know…” This outbreak of just-a-really-awful-week was practically universal. Below are first-hand reports from several of the afflicted people.

 

A college senior reported being “like super sick this week. I had a fever and couldn’t do anything.

 

Another person claimed “literally everything is falling apart right now. It’s like I have the kiss of death or something.”

 

Yet a third person reported “the fire alarm went off at fucking 2am cause someone decided to burn popcorn or something.”

 

And hundreds of students have claimed “I have like a million midterms right now.”

 

Beyond these reports, many have described their symptoms as “just really tired right now” or “one giant 3-day panic attack”

 

While the worldwide shitty-week seems to have passed, there is still significant debate among sources about the coming weeks. Some argue that “it’s just that time in the semester,” while others are saying there may be signs of better weeks to come. The most recent study has claimed that “you got through this one; you can get through the next one.” 

While these messages are not quite hopeful, the results show that this condition is not unique to a single person or even a group of people. In short, just-a-really-awful-week is a pandemic afflicting millions and you are not *alone. 

 

*that special

Leave a Reply